Another sleepless night, and still staring at the ceiling

So its 130 in the morning and i cant sleep. Maybe its because i didnt take my trazadone tonight, but i just dont want to be dependent on sleeping medicine forever. In addition, I am starting this third blog because i felt the other two sucked to be honest. I was trying to write about specific topics but i just want to be able to express myself freely however i want.
I didnt think once about drugs for a whole day and i am so happy. Everything is beginning to fall into place and i am really excited about it. I am taking summer classes at the local community college, i graduated from my outpatient program, I met the most amazing boy, and I got another job. Things couldnt be going any better
I have to be up early in a couple of hours to get ready for work, and im enjoying being a part of something that makes me feel productive. Coming out of using for five years and having nothing to do, would have really sucked. I am extremely grateful for everything that my higher power is putting into my place.
Yesterday i cleaned my whole house, painted my nails, and talked to RK all day. I am honestly trying to change my old behaviors when i was using- relationships and boys was a big part in it. I am assuming because of all the times i was molested and used, i dont value sex. Its probably the one thing about myself i give out the most freely.
But with RK im trying to do everything different.
I am learning to be patient and less anxious and not rush into things. Because when you rush into things, especially a relationship you dont really know what you're getting, and then you're stuck with something you dont want. So you really have to be careful.
I also talked to my best friend MH about molestation and rape. She was at a meeting and apparently that was what everyone was talking about. Im so glad i wasnt there or i would of freaked out, i told her. The thing is that i know im no less of a person because of the things i did when i was using.
I am at peace knowing this and lately i have just been relaxing on the pink cloud i've been sitting on for a week or so now. I know this great enjoyment of life will go away soon, but im really riding it right now. I know there are ups and downs around me, but overall i am centered and constant around it. It feels quite nice.